"You don't have to be gay to have a 14 year old penis"
-Guy on manscaping

"I feel comfortable hearing you come in from behind"
- Guy on visitors

"I can't read it but I can tell that it is wrong."

Guy on his special powers

"I had one of the greatest nights of my life with Nic Hodges."

Guy on what happens on tour, stays on tour.

"I can't wait to get my son or daughter on my norks. No nutrients, but they would be that into norks!"

Guy on Breast feeding.

"It's got to be what's right for the brand, not the man."

Guy on coming second

"I took my mum over to the park... It was kinda like Wicked, it was green."
Guy on Musicals